inherit the storm

why
did you have to leave him?

why did you mess
with his memory?

don't you know
you're a hard act to follow

don't you know
what you did to me?

he stares
and says he trust
he wants
and says he needs
he talks
and says he's open

but there's a cloud overhead
even in skies of blue

torturing him
and me

shadow
or drift away
storm
or disappear
shower
or desert us

even our own misery
is better than the fallout
that you left for he
and me

(go)

settle

cold comfort

deep in the night

hard truths

dawning with 

the day

what you hope

is in your heart

but the reality

in your mind

can't be ignored

to let go

of your 

expectations

lower the bar

to your 

imperfections

to learn to settle

for the

normalcy

it's what's meant to be

 

to live beyond

the fairy tale

(trust)

book of dreams

read to me
from the book of dreams

tell me
what my vision means

and if the definition
seem sweet

i will rush to meet
my fate

when the moonbeams 
shine again

(tell)

15 word: doctors

doctors
are good, but scare me

to be well
means to face
my foolish fears

poised

what's poised
between thought and pen
begins a flowing search
for what's within .....

outlines

waited all day
for the sound of you

lost you
in a race to the moon

wanted all day
to connect with you

missed you
on the road to a dream

connect the dots
back to my heart

if you find me
you'll see

how sketchy i was
to begin with

(gone)

passed over

passing over
the dreams i had

of us

looking over
the ideas i planned

of we

walking away
from the visions
strolling away
from decision

of new

hoping for
the old
to show through

what happened
to the saga of
me and you?

(hope)

sketch of her

a thunderstorm of looks
from her eyes

a waterfall of gestures
from her hands

15 word: imma

if you don't stahp
taking all the covers
imma gonna
tickle you 'til you're blue!

calm down

there's an
impetuousness
that's always
a bit out of step

a girlishness
that's always
a bit too loud

i can't predict
the times
when you'll colour
outside the lines

why can't you stop
running with glee?

calm down,
little one

and learn to be
like me

(quiet)

the shadow of him in her eyes

can't look back
at what we were

i still don't understand it

can't think of you
and where we stood

i still can't face it

was i the bad one
the whole time?

did i not give you
every chance to be mine?

could your heart
ever truly turn

from the thought
of her
to the reality
of me?

how could i have
shown you
all i had

and still not see

that you never looked
at me

as any more
than a distraction

of the pain
you left behind

(blind)

audio version: https://soundcloud.com/jamison99/the-shadow-of-him-in-her-eyes

emo's lament

i wish
i was heartless

i wish
i didn't feel so much

i wish
the tears
didn't come
so readily

i wish
the pain
didn't surface
so suddenly

i wish i could find
a way to say

goodbye

and know it didn't mean
forever

(try)

rain

it's been overcast all day....

it's the kind of a day where you want to be at a coffee shop, at a table near the window.... looking out at the world between streaks of moisture ... writing love letters in longhand ... thinking long distance thoughts...

drops of creativity mirroring city life

snickers

What's going on?
i really don't want to talk about it.
It's ok.  Your face tells all.
great.  i've been walking around with this expression all day.
Your poor co-workers.
snort
How can I help?
you can't. no one can.  it's all me.
Will Doritos help?
small snicker
no. even the gods of nacho and cheese can't pull me out of this.  just .... sit.  and watch me sigh a lot.  and....
And?
hold my hand?
Always.
thanks.....when moods are deep, and full of woe... a hand to grasp is all i know.....
You're not getting all Harry Potter on me, are you?
louder snicker
no....not this week......

homage to conversation

"hi."
"Hi?"

uncomfortable pause

"What are you doing here?"
"well, i was in the neighbourhood, and......"
"Oh. Um...why are you wearing my favourite sweater?"
"well, it was raining, and stuff, so i ...."
"I see. Um... how did you get in?"
"uh...."

uncomfortable pause

"Did you pick my pocket again?"
"it's your fault. you wear them baggy old man jeans."
"Ah. So.... want some of this KFC?"
"i thought you'd never ask........"

dedicated to eric albin

focus

i saw you clearly
through the foggy glass
i took your image to heart
and ran

as far as i could run

now what you are
is what i sketch
in the dark misery
of my loneliness

falling away to sea

stay you
and guide me
to me

(grow)

dance away

how quickly
you danced
away from me

how soon
you found
someone new

how much
i cried
night after night

wishing it weren't true

what happened to me and you?

15: bashful

oh bashful boy

with eyes
that plead
for understanding

sit next to me

and trust

15 word: little time

i have

so little
time

to say what i want
you to know

listen fast

renewing

fearfully
encountering

seriously
looking

learning
all over again

were you always
this tall?

were you always
so giggly?

how different
you seem
up close

and out of dreams

(breathe)

soundtrack

a song
we knew
passed through my head

burying me with dread

you dedicated it to me
long ago
said it made you think
of us

how i used to trust
in the way we could be

how i used to lean
on your shoulder
fitfully
so desperately trying
to transfer the deep thoughts
in my head

to your heart

what didn't start
could never be

but i didn't see then
too caught up
in the soundtrack of us

to hear the reality
of me

(listen)

audio version here: https://soundcloud.com/jamison99/soundtrack

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